Monday, January 19, 2015

Leif's New Talent

Apparently Leif has now added flying to his many other ways of scaring his mother and entertaining his siblings...

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

More Insanity

One does not simply convince her siblings to write a blog post.

A day may come when I manage to bribe them with enough chocolate to make them actually do it...but it is not this day! I don't wanna blow that much money on chocolate right now. So...insanity.

From Florida
Grandma: So that way, two people always win? That doesn't sound like fun!
Ethan: Yeah, 'cause then you'd have to split the money!
Sylvia: Why are Petersons so mercenary???
Camryn: Yeah! We're the only normal ones. Who can hug correctly, and who like to be on teams.
Sylvia: ...I also told you that if we won, you could have the money...
Camryn: Oh yeah. Right.
Ethan: Failing is the word of the past. Like, yesterday.
Camryn: I just shot the moon and won!!!
Ethan: That's messed up. Pass me the M&Ms.
(Leif takes the M&Ms)
Ethan: Hey! Put those back! We earned those!
Knut: Yeah! By failing!
Ethan: No, I don't need M&Ms right now. I'm not depressed. I only need M&Ms when I lose...which, knowing us, won't be long...
Ethan: If you shoot the moon, you have to use something awesome.
Knut: Like a nuke!
Knut: We need consolation fat.
Knut: Ethan, we failed so bad.
Ethan: Pass me the M&Ms.
Camryn: Did you ever get any prize money?
Ethan: Nope...
Camryn: Aww...
Ethan: Can I have a dollar?
Camryn: No.
Ethan: Can I have a hug?
Camryn: Sure.
Ethan: I was really just trying to pickpocket her.
Camryn: My book is calling to me... It's saying, "Read me!!"
Knut: Shut up, book!

Mom (as Travis displays his pyromaniac tendencies): I think you and your brother are related.
"I want you to think about the logic of that statement," Mother...
Sylvia (memorizing Psalm 119): I look on the faceless --FAITHLESS-- with loathing...
...Yep. I have a reverse lisp.
Sylvia: I agree with you sometimes.
Cecily: No you don't.
Sylvia: Yes I do! ...Wait.
(both burst out laughing) Sylvia: YOU SET ME UP!!!!
Cecily: Of course I did.
Cecily: My face is more amazing than yours. Face it: my face is more amazing.
Cecily: One time Knut was telling Thor about Dr. Who and Thor asked what it was about, and Knut said, "a doctor," and I asked, "who?" and he LAUGHED!! And it wasn't even supposed to be funny!
Cecily: He's like, "WHERE'S ALL THE FOOD? WHERE'S ALL THE FOOD?" He looks like a distressed penguin.

Monday, December 29, 2014


From home... 
Gloria: Even Knut will agree with me! Knut, does Thor get all the rest of the chocolate?
Knut: No.
Gloria: Who does?
Knut: Everyone.  
(Sylvia stares at him in dumbfounded shock)
Knut: Haven't you ever heard of deception?  
Rosemary: Oh, no; what do I do? I've gotta look like a blind monkey at the beach!  
Playing Risk...
Papa: Hey, hey hey! Why don't you go through there? Look! You could take over all that!
Knut: How much is it worth?
Papa: a lot!
Knut:It's worth five. That's worth...four.
Papa: See?
Knut: But you have it!  
Knut: Flouch!  
Grandma: So, Knut, what are you going to make?
Knut: Beret pie.
Grandma: Ah, something new and different!
Knut: So? It could be beret pie with extra chocolate! Something new and different! 0=) 
Knut: We should start a new family tradition! Sing "Nearer, My God, to Thee" at every birthday. 
Sylvia: *shivering* Cecily, will you PLEASE stop taking all the warm air out of the room??
Cecily: I can't.
Sylvia *grabs new space heater and plugs it in* ...I love my father. =)
(After a minute...)
Sylvia: Oh! ...It would probably help if I turned it on...  
Papa: I didn't match my choir; I didn't match my family...but I matched myself and I looked snazzy.  
Papa (reading aloud the Christmas letter draft): Leif always manages to do everything so much cuter than everyone else...
Knut: Except for falling into the pond.
Cecily: No, you should have seen his face when he was looking up out of the water; he was adorable! I almost couldn't pick him up; I was laughing so hard!
Knut: So he almost died because he was so cute.  
From Florida...
Camryn: (mimicking Leif) "What do you want to do?" "Guys. I want to do guys."  
Camryn: As I'm stabbing a monkey's face...  
Camryn: Hey Sloan! Do you ever speak to your socks?
Camryn: But...I am crocheting something!
Sylvia: Yeah; whether it's a coaster or a volcano is indeterminate, but...
Camryn: But I feel accomplished, so I'm happy!  
During a championship pinochle tournament in which $5 bills were the grand prizes for A) getting the most points total over 15 hands, B) getting the most double pinochles, and C) successfully shooting the moon the most times: 
Ethan: C'mon, Knut; it's only a game. ...And five bucks. DON'T MESS THIS UP!!!
Knut: So Ethan, our entire goal here is to win five bucks.  
Ethan: Knut, please don't mess this up; I really like money.  
Ethan: Well, why didn't you pass me that?? If I'd needed the ten, I'd be SO mad at you!
Knut: Well, I passed you the queen and the jack of diamonds so we'd have a chance of double pinochle. And get five bucks.
Ethan: Sweet! I'll take five bucks over a rope!  
Knut: I concur.
Sylvia: With what?
Knut: Whatever he wasn't saying.  
Sylvia: How'd I get to this crazy table anyhow??
Knut: You lost.
Sylvia: ...You shush.  
Knut: You say anything and we will punch your face in with a toaster!  
Knut: I make a motion we shoot the moon!
Papa: I make a motion you shoot each other!
Ethan: Good; then it can ricochet off my brain and hit the moon.  
Ethan: Did you lose?
Camryn: No!!! ...We just didn't win.  
Ethan: Nothin' passes by me! Especially five bucks!  
Papa: Shooting the moon takes a little more aim than shooting your foot.
Ethan: Well, I'm pretty good at shooting my foot, so...
(Yeah; Ethan's mercenary.)
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