Josh here.
A wise man once gave me a set of questions to ask whenever I or a friend had experienced a loss of any kind.
1. What did you lose?
2. What didn’t you lose?
3. What did you gain?
I think these three questions are fantastic for helping a person to be grateful for what the Lord has provided. The Bible never promised us an easy life, but rather quite the opposite, so hardship must be expected and properly dealt with.
Several years ago life was exceedingly good for us. Our job was great, money was quite sufficient, home life was fantastic, and all seemed right with the world. I would often turn to Nancy and say “Life sure is good” but I would always add, “…right now.” I had a suspicion that we would be turning a corner at some point.
Eventually that point came, and it was hellfire and brimstone for a number of years. Much of it is too personal to put on the internet, but suffice it to say that I hope no one has to go through what we did. Even now to look back on that nearly causes me to weep. When I asked myself the three questions, it took quite a while to answer the first, since so much had been lost. The second question is rarely difficult to answer, but I was amazed at how lengthy that answer also was. The third was the hardest to answer, but I had to admit, we did have great gains, although some of it took years to manifest.
Last week we had another loss – we were let go by a church that has employed us. This was quite a shock in its suddenness, but we had known that our employment there was not a perfect match. As we tried to think of why God may have led us there, we also pondered the three questions, and it was fairly easy to answer all three this time. I think we’re beginning to trust the Lord more for whatever He brings our way, and our faith is certainly grown much in our trials.
The worst part about any loss is the relationships. Sometimes after experiencing a loss people are hesitant to get in close relationships again, but God calls us to be in community with one another, to “be at peace with all men” and to “go out into the world.” I’m reminded of a modern parable of Jesus who is depicted as a kind of beggar, going about taking people’s sorrows away and giving them his joy. He’s continually weeping as he goes along, for the people he meets give him their sorrows, but he continues on, doing the very thing that gives him pain.
What a beautiful (if not exactly Biblically accurate) picture of the sacrificial aspect of what Christ does for us. But we must not forget that we are called to “go and do likewise.” We are to bear one another’s burdens, and befriend the friendless. We are to continue the struggle, to “fight the good fight,” and to “never tire of doing what is right.” Perhaps Job 13:15 puts it best: “Though he slay me, yet will I put my hope in him.” Indeed we are called to lay down our lives, yet what is that? We have eternal life, and one thing that hardship has taught me is to have a desire to depart this world and to be with the Lord, but also a desire to bring as many with me as possible. We have a job to do before we end our time here. So when you’re knocked down, I would encourage you to get back up again and continue the fight, and may we all fight in such a manner that we hear those beloved words, “Well done, good and faithful servant. Enter into the joy of the Lord.”